I'm nearly 7 months late writing this post, but I guess better late than never. If I'm being honest, Graham's birth and recovery were both very different from my previous two experiences... That, coupled with a worldwide pandemic that appears to be never-ending, a cross-country move, and adjusting to life as a mom of three has occupied a ton of my time.
Right around 35 weeks I began attending bi-weekly monitoring appointments with the Maternal-Fetal Medicine doctor. I had been having some issues with my blood pressure off and on, and my doctor wanted to keep a closer eye on things as we headed towards the end of my pregnancy. Graham's pregnancy was by far my toughest pregnancy to date requiring 3 prescription medications around the clock to keep from vomiting all day, two iron infusions, and a trip or two for IV fluids... And now I was being monitored twice a week, along with my weekly trip to the OB's office...
During my 36 week monitoring appointment, the nurse noticed that Graham was breech. This wasn't a huge deal just yet because he had plenty of time to flip around, but she definitely wanted me to pay attention to it. I came home and immediately googled everything there was to know about breech babies. I reached out to "mom" groups seeking advice on how to flip a breech baby and looking for reassuring stories. I prayed nightly for things to change. I laid upside on an ironing board every single day in hopes of a miracle. I was determined to not have a c-section. (I had no issue with other people who had that experience, but it was completely foreign to me and I was scared.) One night I asked Ryan to give me a priesthood blessing. I knew in my heart after that blessing that Graham was going to be c-section baby and jokingly told Ryan to try again. (P.S. I know that's not how it all works...)
I continued to attend my monitoring appointments and regular third trimester OB appointments for the next few weeks. During this time, Graham was all over the place. Sometimes he was breech, sometimes he was head down, and sometimes he was transverse. The doctor was convinced that he would flip before delivery with all of this movement. I wasn't so sure, but I was trying to be hopeful.
Finally my 39 week appointment rolled around, and Graham was still considered breech. The doctor told me we officially needed to make some kind of plan to get this baby out safely. I wasn't showing any signs of early labor, and she wasn't worried about me having another precipitous labor because of his positioning. That day she told me I had two options. She could attempt an External Cephalic Version and immediately induce if she's successful, or we could schedule a c-section. I asked her what her "gut" was telling her to do, and she told that she felt strongly that Graham should be a c-section baby. My doctor said she wasn't sure why she felt this way and didn't normally recommend c-sections. She said she was pretty sure she would know why she felt that way once Graham was delivered. However, she told me it was ultimately my choice and I could take some time to think about how I wanted to proceed. During this appointment, I remembered the words from Ryan's blessing (the one I didn't like) that said the doctor would know the best course of action to keep the baby and I safe. I immediately told her I didn't need to think it through. If she thought a c-section was best, then I would trust her expertise and schedule one.
I left that Monday appointment and headed straight to the hospital for a covid test. I was scheduled for surgery two days later. On Wednesday, March 31 at 8 am I walked into the hospital with my hair and makeup done after a full night of sleep. I had a packed bag for the hospital with everything I could need, and a little more. It was kind of a surreal experience in some ways. I didn't feel like I was having a baby that day at all. After some bloodwork and a quick ultrasound to confirm he was still breech, I was taken back for surgery. They took me into the operating room first to prep and administer the spinal anesthesia. Ryan had to wait alone for about 30 minutes before they brought him into the operating room. The anesthesiologist that day is probably one of the best doctors I've ever met. He recognized that I was nervous and walked me through every single step of the operation, and made sure I understood what was happening and how I was going to feel.
Graham Michael was born at 10:31 am that day. He had the umbilical cord wrapped around his neck twice, confirming that the decision to deliver him by c-section was the correct choice. The odds are fairly good that had I chosen to proceed with the ECV and deliver him vaginally, he would have gone into distress and I would have ended up in an emergency c-section. I know the doctor was truly inspired and I am grateful to Heavenly Father for helping Graham enter the world safely. Ryan was the first person to hold him. He held Graham while I was stitched back up. I was feeling a little "off" during the procedure and wasn't ready to hold my new fragile baby just yet.
I am apparently on a mission to collect birth experiences. I can officially check off epidural, "natural" and c-section. C-sections are no joke, and any mama who delivers that way deserves the biggest trophy! I think we often forget how major this surgery really is... and you're still expected to take care of a human afterwards. I am allergic to pretty much all the good pain medications, so that made my recovery a little challenging. It definitely took a few weeks to feel like I could move normally again, and I can honestly say that seven months later I still don't feel 100% recovered. We had lots of help from family after Graham came home, and it was much needed!
Graham has been a little different from his big brother and big sister. He hates bottles. He hates pacifiers. He hates formula. Graham is only into breastmilk straight from the tap, and that's been tough for me. Graham is the sweetest, happiest little guy who adores all of us. We all are pretty obsessed with him, too.
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