"Mom Shaming" and New Mom Victories

Facebook is filled with all of these "wife and mom support groups". Every group has their own gimmicks and some are definitely better than others. (Feel free to send me an email or message if you want some feedback on which ones I think are decent...) I always ignored most of the "mom" posts until the second I was pregnant with Dalton. Suddenly I could relate to all of these posts about motherhood and pregnancy...

What is funny to me about these groups is that they are created to provide a safe place for moms to seek advice and support, but often times many of the women end up bashing each other's decisions. Many of the groups ban topics like car seats, vaccines, and circumcisions because no one seems to have anything nice to say. I've also noticed that people like to "mom shame" especially when those moms are also celebrities... But last time I checked a celebrity mom isn't any less human than someone else.   

This morning while scrolling Facebook I came across a post from someone stating how funny she found it that this celebrity mama had just left the house for the first time by herself with her baby. The celebrity was a new mom and the baby was about 2 months old. The poster also argued that this is the easiest time to take a baby out and it'll only get tougher as the baby grows. While this poster has a point - I'm sure taking a newborn out of the house is way simpler than a toddler - it isn't appropriate to shame that celebrity for her real fears and insecurities.  

I hated leaving the house with Dalton by myself at the beginning. I was always nervous that something was going to go terribly wrong when I left the house like crying uncontrollably, major blowout, nursing strike, etc. Dalton hated riding in his car seat and nursing in public was horrible for several reasons. It was a total adjustment preparing to walk out of the house with everything I might need rather than just grabbing a purse and going. It was WAY easier and comfortable for me to go somewhere with a friend or my husband who could help if something went south. 

After a few times of doing everything alone, I felt more and more confident. I knew how to better manage the baby and was less worried about what people were thinking when my kid started screaming in public. But I'll be honest - I didn’t get out all that much, especially by myself, for the first few months. I was envious of my other new mommy friends who appeared to leave the house almost daily with their newborns and seemed to handle it like a rockstar. Becoming a new mom is a total adjustment period, and everyone adjusts differently! I have no idea if this celebrity mom has anxiety or PPD. It really might be an accomplishment for her to leave the house, especially by herself with a new baby. 

So to any new mama out there (or soon-to-be new mama), give yourself a round of applause if you left the house with your newborn. I know it isn't an easy task. And as a new mom, you deserve to celebrate every single victory even if it appears silly or small to someone else. They say the motherhood tasks get more challenging as your little one grows, but you also get stronger and more confident to handle it all! 

You got this Mama!